the death i fear

The death I fear is not quiet.
Or screeching nails on a chalkboard

It is not cold, hollow, pulseless
A serial killer docuseries
It does not involve maggots
Flesh-consuming bacteria
or acids that burn out my eyes...

The death  I fear
Is one in which my too-eager existence,
Where I make your bed,
bring you coffee,
remind you to buy a present for your mom,

Leaves you with a pain in your chest so deep and dark
you can't look into my eyes...

Where the past is too painful
And you push me away...

This is the death I fear...
Living, but
Without you